partybarackisinthehousetonight:
pro tip: fill the piñata with absolutely nothing to prepare your kids for the letdowns of adulthood
If you get in a fight, and somebody yells “worldstar”. You better fight for your life.
the best part about being the little spoon while cuddling is being able to rub your butt against the person’s junk
The best part about being the big spoon while cuddling is getting to rub your junk against the person’s butt
The best part about the big spoon as that it lets me get bigger portions of ice cream as I cry alone in my room.
Three types of people
She’s the kind of girl a guy meets when he’s too young, and he fucks up because there’s too much living to do. But later he realizes she’s perfect.
Californication (via mviso)
(Source: seventh-story-nobody)











